I sure hope you succeed in your adaptation towards becoming a happy older person. Based upon the courage and insight it took to write this story; I’d bet you do succeed. Don’t give up hope. Many people (I’m one) go through misery in their fifties and become the happiest they have ever been before from 60–80 (after 80 all bets are off!). So, like you, many choose to buckle down and fight now for the promise of greater happiness during those last 20 “good” years. Others just let go and skip to age 80, choosing to wallow in misery until entropy finally relieves them of the burden of being alive. I hope you keep fighting!

Now I want to thank you for something and ask you for a favor.

I’m a fit 64 and my girlfriend is 49 (but at first glance looks like 29, and even after study and then guessing, most people guess she might be as old as 39). Even though we are good together in many ways that have nothing to do with age or body image; I have bouts of insecurity about how astoundingly more beautiful she is than me.

I am thankful for your article because it mades me think, “Gosh, I can be there for my friend when she goes through the misery of the fifties, so maybe our age difference can be a good thing for her during that time.”

You could do me a favor by commenting how you think having a stable, happy, and loving partner during the worst of your recent struggles might have helped you. Also, if you don’t mind, please give me some pointers about how to be supportive in that regard.

SGI Buddhist, Loves Irish and Latin American Literature, History buff, knows a great deal about Medicare

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